it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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