Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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