Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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