Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
