he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I wish there were birth control emojis
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
