they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
