Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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