there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Operation Purity has been aborted
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
