it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
