It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
