You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
