Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize