i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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