Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog