ADVERTISEMENT

• (214): View more from Texas

  in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now

  (469): View more from Texas

  Pride?

  (214): View more from Texas

  thats a pack of cougars

  (469): View more from Texas

  go fuck yourself

  Fav 22 4493 988

  share tweet
  

• (216): View more from Ohio

  6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.

  Fav 7 6280 1174

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five

  Fav 4 2659 1050

  share tweet
  

• (919): View more from North Carolina

  Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  Because we had sex in one.

  Fav 7 6022 1256

  share tweet
  

• (757): View more from Virginia

  She fuckin peed on me

  (817): View more from Texas

  Stay golden ponyboy

  Fav 17 5191 1490

  share tweet
  

• (850): View more from Florida

  Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.

  Fav 4 1353 874

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (303): View more from Colorado

  Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat

  Fav 6 1232 624

  share tweet
  

• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower

  Fav 1 750 1369

  share tweet
  

• (269): View more from Michigan

  He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.

  Fav 7 1158 613

  share tweet
  

• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament

  Fav 2 923 328

  share tweet
  

• (713): View more from Texas

  AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...

  Fav 1 210 199

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (312): View more from Illinois

  I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi

  Fav 1 77 21

  share tweet
  

• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?

  Fav 0 46 9

  share tweet
  

• (647): View more from Ontario

  I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part

  Fav 0 35 3

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients

  Fav 0 22 37

  share tweet
  

Randomize