Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
