If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
