So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
