It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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