im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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