Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
