I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
