On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
thus making me awesome and them whores
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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