The best revenge is premature balding
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize