I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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