she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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