I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
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