So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
