Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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