yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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