If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize