no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
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