That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize