Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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