whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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