I cockslap morals
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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