if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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