Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
