i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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