I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize