no you cant smoke seaweed
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
