All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
