she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
