Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
