Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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