Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
