I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Randomize
