Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.

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(253): View more from Washington

i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"

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(815): View more from Illinois

just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.

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(416): View more from Ontario

Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.

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(913): View more from Kansas

come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.

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(510): View more from California

Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.

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(519): View more from Ontario

You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.

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(720): View more from Colorado

I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.

(303): View more from Colorado

Where are you???

(720): View more from Colorado

Yoga class :(

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