you turned your livingroom into a bong?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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