no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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