I've blown a few things in my day
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
